Signs And Serious Stuff …

It has to be a good sign to get a spot on the wooden doors leading into the Man Cave at The Cabin.

Kinda like, Heaven Is A Little Closer In A Home By The Water.  Or, Every So Often Go Where You Can Hear A Wooden Screen Door Slam Shut.  Or, My Wife Says I Never Listen; At Least That’s What I Think She Said.

Friends and family have added to the collection hanging on the inside of the garage doors. If lucky enough to be allowed to enter this area, most folks like to pause for a quick read.  But not everybody gets a pass into the Man Cave.  Interior decorators, for example, have lifetime bans.  You’re likely to be disqualified, too, if you are wearing a necktie or a dress.  Cry-babies have to straighten up before getting in.

Lots of important plans have been devised in the Man Cave.  Usually with grandchildren.  Like how to thin out the nuisance squirrel population that loves to gnaw at the cabin’s corners.  Or, how to improve our chances of catching a 30-pound catfish.  Or, whether to use blindfolds when taking visitors to our secret fishing spots.  Serious stuff.

Lots of schemes have been devised in the Man Cave, too.  Schemes are different from plans.  A scheme, for example, is like devising a way to sneak neighbor Bill’s pontoon out of his boat house so he thinks it has floated away.  Or, how best to use a rubber snake around the fire pit.  Or, finding the best hiding place for bubble gum and chocolate so parents don’t know you have it.

There’s a man cave rule, however, that has earned two different spots on the doors, which means it is super important:  What Happens At The Cabin Stays At The Cabin.  Again, serious stuff.  Just ask the grandkids. Some of these plans and schemes could get us in trouble.  And have.

The collection of signs and sayings for the Man Cave goes back many years, and the doors are filling up.  But there always seems to be a little nook or cranny for another.  Most of the signs make a lot of sense. Such as . . .  I Wasn’t Born At The Lake But I Got There As Fast As I Could.  Or,  I’d Rather Be Lost At The Lake Than Found At Home.  Or, Looking For High-Speed Internet Access?  Then Why Did You Come To The Lake?

And, the philosophical signs carry really deep messages.  Like, We Don’t Stop Laughing Because We Grow Old, We Grow Old Because We Stop Laughing.  And, I Hope My House Is Always Too Small For All My Friends.  Better still,  If A Man Says He Will Fix It, HE WILL!  No Need To Remind Him Every Six Months About It!  Or, a couple of favorites of the grandkids (and some adults), I Can’t Be Good All The Time and I Laughed So Hard Tears Ran Down My Leg.

Some are simple and to the point, but all seem to carry a message or make you think:  Home of the Free Because of the Brave;  Keep Calm and Carry On;  Our Slice of Heaven; and, Fish Stories Told Here.

Some of the others can help keep trouble away.  Like, If At First You Don’t Succeed Try Doing It The Way Your Wife Told You.  That one has helped me lots in the past with my WW.  And, some signs address attitudes: $5 Charge For WHINING or Complaint Department 100 Miles Away.

Honestly, there’s a lot of truth to some of the signs.  Like, Through These Doors Pass The World’s Greatest Fishermen.  And, The Grill Master Lives Here With His Old Flame.  Or, Genuine Antique Person – Been There, Done That, Can’t Remember.  Don’t remember the smart aleck who sent that one.

Enough of this.  The Lake Is Calling And I Must Go.